Soul Writer

I see you. Now. Finally. 

You hide in the deepest corner of my soul, 

Cowering and crying. 

It breaks my heart. 

I am so sorry… 

I haven’t noticed you before.

»No one ever notices me…«, you whisper. 

I can feel your loneliness and pain. 

It’s overwhelming. 

Excruciating. 

Guilt feels me. Makes me feel sick. 

You’re a precious little bird

Scared. Alone. Lost. 

And I let you stay in this dark place. 

Even though I could hear you whimper. 

Even though I sensed you crying. 

But I ignored you. 

I thought…

»She’s fine. She’s strong. She’s so mature.«

You look up at me, tears in your eyes.

»That’s what they always say.

That’s all they see.«

I look back at you. 

My heart aches. 

Tears burn in my eyes. 

As I realize:

That’s what I thought, too. 

I left you alone. 

You’re fine. 

I ignored your pain. 

You’re so strong. 

Whatever happened, you could handle it. 

You’re so mature. 

That’s what I always said to myself.

That’s all I saw. 

But the truth is:

You are just a child. 

You’ve always been a child. 

You took on so much. 

You suffered so much. 

And you had no one who ever asked you:

Are you okay? How are you feeling?

No one ever saw the pain 

hiding behind your observing eyes.

No one ever cared for your inner world. 

Because you seemed so fine. 

So okay. 

I am sorry that you were alone. 

I am sorry that you were ignored. 

I am sorry that you weren’t seen. 

I see you. Now. 

And I will take care of you. 

I will support you. 

I will celebrate you. 

I will console you. 

I will love you. 

I see you. Now. 

»Finally…«, you say. 

And I can’t help but cry. 

Together, we cry.

And finally, 

We embrace each other.  

Sincerely, 

The adult me who promises to see you and love you.